kold pillow toniqht .

firstbloqq .

------

alot thouqhts been on my mind and its hard to keep it all in my head or text it to phone diary note . so i let the finqers press on whatever to qet everythinq off my chest . well everythinq was qreat and happy till i made a step closer . and i wish i never did . there some thinqs i wished my eyes can [unsee] and my heart could [unfeel] .

------

and first off ; alot ppl warned about havinq a bloqsite : ppl can see everythinq . they qet and lovemake on your business . which is true ppl just feed off other's shit ; in simple terms but i say ; you welcomed to know w.e. if we feel the same and if our feelinqs differ feel free to hit the [x] kust i wouldn't care . so ; now that, that's clear and out .

today ; i learned that no matter what you try to hide from someone . it some how ; ... some how . happens to qet to the other person .. aqain some how . [blood is hard to unstain] . *lonq siqh* and riqht when i thouqht i would never open up to the other qender type -- aqain in my life . i found my self floatinq aloft and carried downstream . not knowinq where i am qoinq or where this carriaqe will take me . i have left off everythinq aside and focused on you . and simple as i miqht put it . i fell hard n broke a tooth . and prob. even bled some heartache today . and for the first time . aqain after i promised myself not to . but offcourse you would apoloqize . and come to think of it over what ? the internet ? no but it just would be sooo nice if ppl didn't hide shit till you find out -- even if you tellinq the truth and admittinq it after . its not the same if you would have came in the beqn. and said hey babe this is what happened . and i thouqht i would let you so it wouldn't be a katstrophy when you find out yourself . WHY CAN'T STOP BEINQ SO SCARED OF WHAT'S QONNA HAPPEN IF YOU TELL THE TRUTH BEFORE THE OTHER PERSON FINDS OUT ? .. but trust me its a less snowball efffect that way . and for me trust is huqqqeee . you lose my trust and you lose any lifeline connection . .. and u can't hide thinqs forever -- but i still love you dearly .

-----------

well if the earthquake ; the rain ; and the pain has stopped please let me know .. i wanna sleep toniqht alone -- on a koldkold pillow toniqht .